Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Anyone that still likes Death Cab For Cutie or The Postal Service should kill themselves now.

Do the world a favour, eat a bullet.

Trust me, we'd all be better off without you. You're going to hell (if there is one) for worshipping a False Idol anyway, why delay the inevitable? Email Benjamin Gibbard and ask him for a bag of quarters or even toonies so you can beat yourself to Death (maybe in a Cab) with it. I'm sure he's got more than enough money to send from selling his soul to the devil and selling out so many times I can't even count.

Not only did I hear a few Death Cab songs like 4 years ago playing in The Gap on a specially made-for-The-Gap ambient music CD when I was walking through the store....but I just saw quite possibly the worst, and funniest, sell out of all time.

So I just happened to be walking by the TV when I saw a commercial and heard the familiar song Such Great Heights playing. I look downstairs to see if someone is on the computer and playing an MP3 really loudly cause I couldn't imagine why on earth that song would actually be on the television.

Then, I saw it. The commercial was for, none other than..............UPS. The United Parcel Service:

United Parcel Service
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United Parcel Service Inc.

Public (NYSE: UPS)
August 28, 1907, Seattle, WA
Sandy Springs, Georgia, USA
Key people
Michael L. Eskew, Chairman & CEO
Air Courier
Freight Forwarding ServicesLogistics Services
$42.581 billion USD (2005)
Operating income
$6.143 billion USD (2005)
Net income
$3.870 billion USD (2005)
407,000 (
Mail Boxes Etc.
What can Brown do for you?
United Parcel Service Inc. (
NYSE: UPS), commonly referred to as UPS, is the world's largest package delivery company, delivering more than 14 million packages a day to more than 200 countries around the world. It has recently expanded its operations to include logistics and other transportation-related areas. It is headquartered in Sandy Springs, Georgia, USA.
UPS is well-known for its
brown trucks, internally known as package cars (hence the company nickname "The Big Brown Machine",

Major competitors include
United States Postal Service (USPS)

So....The band, The Postal Service, does television ads for UPS, or the Big Brown Machine. Too bad they couldn't get a deal with UPS's major competitor the actual Postal Service, but they sold out anyway and took the money.

Hey Ben, go die.

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